You wear the paparazzi hat and glasses, along with a trench coat, beneath of which is the hidden package to be passed among persons, quickly and discretely.
This is a known fact.
So why when I get to the lab, stool in position, ready for the pass.....no one behaves like the drug deal in front of a police station scenario, I prayed for.
Instead there is a huge fuss about bringing it out, and loudly asking if I put my name on each vial of stool.
Dear God,kill me know.
Of course that was taken care of before I left the privacy of my home. Please take the bag, so I can run from this office where it feels now that everyone is aware, and watching........not because it is of any concern or even interest to them........but there is nothing else to entertain them, as they wait in the long walk-in line for lab work.
After making sure everyone knew what I had brought, they asked about some paperwork I had given them the day prior when I came in to give blood, and had been given the stool kit, that, btw, I wasn't allowed to fill there......
Realizing that I didn't have the paperwork, the ladies informed me that I would have to "trash" my samples, and come back another day, with a fresh batch, and doctor's orders.......
I was going to have to start entire process over.
Putting on my social work hat, I pretended I was advocating for someone else. Pretended it was my sister I was defending, as I stepped forward with a confidant stance,showing I wasn't going to budge.
I informed them calmly that it took 3 buses to get there....
that I had appointments lined up solely based on these tests being in on this day.....
.that this had been their unfortunate miscommunication......
then stated that we needed to find a solution outside the box.
They decided my doctor could send a fax. Then realized their fax was broken.
Still embarrassing bag in-hand......you've got to be joking.
Ok, so what else you got, I asked.....still unwilling to budge now that I had already been "made" on what was supposed to be discrete, speedy, and painless.
Next suggestion was to have Dr put information directly into their system.
So I called Dr's office.
Of course, the woman there, told me she had no access to do what they had suggested.
She suggested that she send the fax, and that once their machine was running again they would get it.
So I suggest this to them, and am told that they don't know how long it will be down.
"Could be down a week." The woman informs me, still not wanting to be bothered by trying to find a viable solution.
"You are telling me that you are a medical facility, that relies on faxing ability, and you think it might take a week for your tech to fix a fax machine?" I asked, still very calm.....just trying to understand how this would be so.
Just then, my doctors fax comes through.....who knows if it was even broken, or if the staff just didn't feel like being bothered by having to do whatever they needed to, to send out my precious cargo, to their parent lab.
Mission accomplished......with only one phone call.
And they said it couldn't be done.
All I had to do is give up my pride, and my need to hide.
And found that when you seek resolution, you will find there is usually more than one answer to any given problem.
Last stool I will ever give at lab.